Memories
by Hannio
Summary: After a fight Raphael loses his memories. He can't remember his friends, he can't remember his family he can barely remember himself. Can they bring him back or is the Raphael they know lost forever.Chapter 4 is up.
1. Fire

Memories

By

Hannio

Chapter One 

Fire

**Disclaimer – **_None of the characters mentioned in the below story below belong to me in any fashion. I'm merely using them for my own use._

**Author Note – **_Here's another chapter story. I've had this on my laptop for a long time, as in this was actually the first TMNT story I wrote. I've been hesitant over putting it up because it's written in first person and normally I write in 3__rd__ person but I figured what the hell. I've written Raph's portion in normal English because there Is no way I could write it to reflect the way he speaks so please bear that in mind while reading it. Also please bear in mine that Raph has lost his memory hence his confusion. So yeah please enjoy!_

Jesus I hurt.

Every organ in my body hurt almost as though there was fire running through my vein instead of blood causing even the most lightest of movements to make me want to curse up a storm. It didn't help matters that my vision wasn't great either, blackness tingeing the edge of my sight making me feel as though I was stuck in a never ending tunnel which in turn made everything appear even more hectic and confusing.

I couldn't figure out where I was, what I was doing there and even more worrying who I actually was. Using my brain produced a feeling akin to having a sharp piece of glass stabbed repeatedly into the organ so I stopped trying to use it. It seemed the safer option at that time.

What I really wanted to do was to lie down and rest and at that one moment in time the floor, cool and solid beneath me, felt as good as any bed I've slept in. Even the sight of it looked as though it would promise me some form of comfort but I could almost hear a warning bell going off in my head and I knew that It was something I had to obey even if it made no sense. There was something which I needed to do before I could do anything. Something that was more important then my desire to sleep. It was a just a shame that I couldn't actually remember what that important thing was meant to be.

I looked down at my hands and felt my eyes widen at the sight of them. They were bloody though whether with my blood or someone else's I couldn't actually tell. Both of them were wrapped around weapons, or at least what I assumed were weapons if the blood dripping down them was any indication for what they had been used for. Whatever they were there was something about them that made my hands tightened on them rather then letting them go which had been my original plan.

I shook my head slightly, hissing at the pain that shot down my neck into my back making me unable to focus on anything other then my breathing as the blackness in my vision threatened to overwhelm me. After a few seconds the pain lessened and my vision returned allowing me to glance round the room. I could see a figure which appeared different from the rest. There was something about that figure which made my heart start to stutter and before I knew what I was doing I had forced myself to put the weapons away, stuffing them into my belt, before I began moving towards the figure.

The air was smoky forcing me to cough as shivers racked my body hindering the speed in which I could move forward. My legs didn't seem to be co-operating at all with the messages I was sure my brain was sending them. In fact none of my body seemed to be reacting. I felt as though someone else was in charge of it and I was a mere bystander watching the action as it happened.

I halted my movement trying to steady my breathing again which had turned erratic but the action forced me to cough more due to the smoke. There was the taint of something else to the air, something which I couldn't quite put my fingers on but which I knew shouldn't have been there. I ignored the thought as unimportant and began moving forward again towards the figure, sweat dripping off of me from the effort.

I couldn't remember anything about what had happened to me prior to waking up in pain, how had I ended up with a permanent scream lodged in my throat as every movement caused a shot of agony to race through me I wasn't sure. It felt as though there wasn't a single part of me left unaffected. Feeling like this couldn't have been normal could it? I grinded my teeth together as I continued pulling myself across the floor, ignoring the glass I could feel imbedding itself into my skin. A cry of triumph escaped me as my outstretched hand touched the arm of the person I had been heading for. I curled my fingers around it and used it to pull myself forward.

I pulled myself up into a sitting position and looked down into the face, a frown coming to my own. I didn't recognise him but I knew that I couldn't just leave him in here; he seemed to be in bad shape from what I could tell. I ran my eyes over him to see what injuries he had. From the angle of the leg it was pretty clear to anyone that it was broken and cuts littered his skin, some quite deep and nasty looking which would need to be looked at. My heart squeezed sharply at the sight of him looking like that.

"Hey" I said my voice rough sounding as I touched his shoulder giving him a light shake being careful not to do it too hard "Hey Buddy are you ok?" when there was no response I shook his slightly harder, breathing out a sigh of relief as he groaned and moved slightly. He opened his eyes and squinted up at me, confusion in his blue eyes which quickly changed to recognition and relief.

"Raph" he said, he sounded tired and in pain "Seriously dude, not one of our brightest ideas". I blinked as I forced myself to my knees, my lips clamped tightly together as I swallowed the scream of pain the simple action caused. Clearly this person knew me.

"I'm Raph?" I asked. There was a silence as the boy blinked at me, the relieved expression on his face falling into a frown at my question.

"Are you Raph?" he repeated "What do you mean are you Raph?" he demanded "Come on even I know that now is not the time to be playing games, did you get a humour bypass or something or hit your head" I blinked at his angry tone.

"I can't exactly remember" I answered blandly. I hesitated for a moment before I asked the next question that had been plaguing me since I had seen him. "Do I actually know you?"" he opened his mouth to say something before he closed it as his eyes took in the expression in mine. I watched the anger in them fade to be replaced by worry as they widened.

"Do you know me?" he repeated again, clearly repeating questions was his style "Of course you know me Raph; come on this seriously isn't funny. Its me Mikey, you know Michelangelo" he must have seen the lack or recognition I was feeling reflected in my face because he continued "I'm your brother?" Brother, something in my mind clicked at the word. This boy lying in front of me was my brother. I glanced to the side of me before looking back at him. I could try and figure this all out later.

"Can you stand Michelangelo? We've got to get out of here right now." I couldn't remember why I had to get him out of there all I knew was that keeping him safe was the most important thing to me.

"Don't call me Michelangelo you know I hate it Raph, It always means I've got in trouble over something yet again." I remained silent as I watched him attempt to sit up by himself. He got a small distance before lowering his body with a cry of pain, his fists coming to his eyes and covering them for a moment as he shook. I wanted to gather him up in a hug and comfort him but I didn't, I got the impression that he wouldn't have appreciated the action.

"No I can't" he answered, his voice faint as he lowered his hands and looked at me "Raph you should probably go on without me, you know get out of here before the others come, this whole mess is my fault anyway and now you…" he stopped mid sentence, turning his head away so he was looking at the side instead of at me. I snorted through my nose as I bent down wrapping my arm round his shoulder. I tried to be as gentle as I could but he still flinched at the contact with a muffled cry. I swallowed at the sound and closed my own eyes wishing that everything was less confusing and that it made sense to me.

Forcing my eyes open I spoke in a gruff tone.

"Spare me the dramatic self sacrificing speeches, they don't suit you and they bore me." I wasn't sure how I knew that but as I said the words I knew they were true. "This is really going to hurt Mikey" I commented placing my other hand under his legs being careful not to joist the broken leg "As in really hurt, try and stay with me if you can, I'm going to need you but if you can't then you can't." Mikey nodded at me, a determined look coming to his eyes.

"Alright let's do it" he stated, there was a brief silence after he had spoken. I was trying to brace myself for the pain I knew was about to hit me like a tidal wave. I wanted to rest but I had to get Mikey away from here "Look Raph I'm really sorry about everything this is my fault" I rolled my eyes well aware that he could see me since his eyes were glued to my face.

"Seriously enough of the mind-numbing speeches, if you say one more thing like that then I'll knock you out myself. You aren't…" my voice trailed off as the name I wanted to say escaped me. I knew someone who normally did those sorts of speeches, someone who really pissed me off when he did. I tried to follow the train of thought but swiftly gave up as the pain grew too much.

"As…" he prompted softly, I shook my head and spoke my voice tinged with the frustration I was feeling inside.

"I don't remember" I replied, he made a sound but I ignored it instead looking around me cautiously. I had been so intent on getting to my brother, to make sure he was still alive that I had ignored my surroundings completely. From the look of it we were in some kind of warehouse, boxes were piled high, most wrecked, some still intact, some splattered with blood. There were bodies of all different sizes everywhere and I realised now the taint of the air I had smelt earlier was the smell of blood. We had clearly been in one hell of a fight which would indicate why we were both so injured.

I listened but I couldn't hear any sound over our own breathing and yet I knew instinctively that it didn't mean that there was no one in there with us. It was easy to mask the sound of breathing and movement if you had been trained to do so.

"Let's go" I remarked, I sucked in a deep breath as I stood. The pain that lanced up my leg was enough to wipe out all other thoughts from my head other then the thought that the pain would kill me before I got Mikey to safety. I locked the joint into place almost screaming from the effort it took to keep us both upright, clearly some damage had occurred to my leg but I wasn't sure what exactly. Whatever it was hurt like a bitch though.

I had to get us some help; there was somewhere we could go, some vague memory taunting me with knowledge that was just out of reach. There was someone who would help us and knew about healing. He would look at Mikey first I would make sure of it and then once I knew he was ok I could finally rest.

"Raphie there's a… a sewer over there, I saw it earlier during the fight" I glanced down at him and saw that he was pointing at something, his arm shaking from the effort of keeping it upright.

"I see it" I replied. He dropped his arm in relief. I took one more glance around me before I began to move towards it. Every step seemed to take forever, trying to walk with the added weight was making me lightheaded and nauseous but I had to keep going. I was the only one who could help Mikey.

I sighed in relief as I reached it and allowed myself to unlock my knee, almost instantly I fell to the floor only just managing to keep Mikey from smacking the ground. I took a quick second to gather myself before forcing myself up, my eyes automatically finding the manhole cover that Mikey had pointed out. If moving hadn't been so much of an effort I would have kissed it. I knew that if we got down there we would be safe.

"How are you holding up?" I asked Mikey, turning to look at him. He was sweating and looked exhausted. A feeling of guilt blossomed in my stomach; I should have taken better care of him.

"Meh so, so" he replied "What about you Raphie-boy can you… can you remember much?" he asked, his voice turning quiet. I shrugged without thinking and instantly regretted the action as my muscles burned.

"No" I replied shortly bringing a hand up to my forehead. I didn't want him to know the extent of my injuries so I brushed off his concern. "My head is far too hard to crack though" I remarked. It was clearly the right thing to say as he snorted and rolled his eyes at me. I took a deep breath and reached down, grasping the sides of the cover and pulled. I grunted in pain as my body protested but I continued regardless and was rewarded by the popping sound it made as it came free. I pushed it out the way and took in a few more deep breaths as I fought to stay awake.

"Mikey" I said, my voice sounding faint to my own ears "You need to hold on to me, you know in a…" words failed me for a moment as I struggled to think before a sudden memory of laughter filled my head. I basked in it for a second. There were 4 of us and we were laughing and jumping on each others back. The memory faded but the name remained "In a shell back"

"Shell back" Michelangelo repeated with a slight disbelieving laugh. "Come on Raphael, you can barely stand as it is and your memory is gone" his voice trailed off and I heard him swallow deeply before he continued speaking "Raph you haven't" his voice faltered for a moment "Shell backed me since we were 11" I frowned at him

"Well then you should stop moaning and count yourself special then because you're getting one now whether you want to or not. We need to climb down there and I'm going to need both my hands for it. Are you going to be able to hold on to me?" there was a slight silence as he considered my question.

"I can hold on, I'm not that badly injured" he said stubbornly acting as if his leg wasn't broken. I found myself chuckling at that for some reason before I stopped shaking my head instead. I had more important things to focus on.

"Course not" I replied "Give me your arms then" I reached out my hands and grasped the ones he held out to me, making sure I was gentle. I turned myself so I was facing the man hole, hissing slightly at the movement. I used one hand to wrap his arms round my neck and used the other one to help get him into position "Hold tightly and don't let go" I could hear Mikey shuffle forward, wincing as I heard his muffled sound of pain as he did.

Was this my fault? Was I the reason for his injuries? I felt a shot of self loathing directed at myself. Why couldn't I remember anything? I was useless in this state.

"Oi Raphie-boy I'm ready, let's get the hell out of here, I've things to do" I realised that he was in position, his arms and one good leg wrapped tightly around me as if he was never going to let go.

"Not so tight that I can't breathe knucklehead" I responded. I felt him sigh

"Moan, moan, moan, moan, moan" I heard him mutter to himself even as his grip around my neck lessened allowing me to breathe slightly easier.

"I can hear you, you know. There's nothing wrong with my hearing" I commented as I shuffled forward. I took a hold of the cool metal ladder and twisted myself around before I had time to think. The one action took my breathe away and I felt myself sway for a moment before I controlled myself. I looked around the warehouse one more time to make sure we were safe before forcing myself to climb down.

God it hurt so much to move, even gripping the rungs seemed to be too much effort. Everything felt heavy and unreal to me, like I was stuck in a nightmare that I was unable to wake up from.

"Where… where are we Mikey?" I eventually managed to get our, my voice sounding weak and breathless. I could feel him react to my voice, a slight shifting as he tried to ease the pressure on me as much as he could. I needed him to talk to me, to distract me from the pain. My thoughts and body were turning slow and sluggish.

"You really don't remember anything at all?" he demanded, a tone of panic to his voice.

"I'm not playing a game here Mikey" I snapped. I didn't like admitting any sort of weakness to anyone. He was silent for a moment before he spoke.

"We're about 2 miles away from our home Raph" he replied "I'll explain everything to you there. I can walk, you can let me down" I shook my head as I began walking in the direction he had indicated to me.

"Not in this life time" I stated "I need you to guide me home. I can't remember the exact route" I heard him breathe in sharply and his arms tightened briefly but other then that he remained silent. I sighed, this was going to be a long trek home.

**Author Note – **_So there's chapter one, this story is done in first person and the next chapter belongs to Leo. Please review! Many Thanks._


	2. Earth

Memories

By

Hannio

Chapter Two

Earth

**Disclaimer – **_None of the characters mentioned in the below piece of fiction belong to me in any shape or fashion. I'm merely using them for my own entertainment purposes._

**Author Note – **_Surprisingly hard chapter to write so I'm quite pleased I've finally churned it out. Hopefully chapter three which belongs to Mikey will be easier to write. Sometimes I can't shut Leo up and other times like now I can't get him to talk to me at all. Still I'm fairly please with the chapter so yay!_

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Where were they?

I hated having to wait, hated the feeling that would begin to occur as I began to worry over them. Surely they should have been back by now? It didn't take this long to do something as simple as picking up some pizzas from the local pizzeria and to bring them back home. Even if they had taken the scenic route to do it they should still have been back about twenty minutes ago and that was if they had been walking at a snail like pace.

Where were they?

My eyes snapped open and I sighed, the sound impatient in the otherwise silent room. I couldn't concentrate on anything. There was nothing on the TV which distracted me from my thoughts. The book I was currently reading couldn't hold my attention and my attempts at it had resulted in me reading the same line three times in a row before it even registered what I was doing. Even the attempts I had made at mediating had been useless.

I should have gone with them; I must have been out of my mind to allow Raph and Mikey to go out together just the pair of them without either me or Donnie with them. It had always ended up a disaster in the past so god only knew what made me think it could or would be different this time.

I shook my head as I pushed myself off of my bed and onto my feet, my eyes scanning my room with disinterested eyes before I left the room. I stopped outside, glancing over the banister to see whether the pair of them had returned while I was in my room but the living area was bare of life beneath me. They still weren't back.

I sighed out loud rubbing the back of my neck trying to ignore the panicky feeling that was beginning to blossom in my stomach, some instinct that was screaming at me that something just wasn't right and that they were in some form of trouble and needed me.

Where the hell were they?

I made my way quickly down the stairs, my feet automatically taking me to Donnie's lab where I knew he would be holed up. Perhaps he would be able to shed some light on what exactly was happening and why they weren't back yet? He normally had a theory for everything. I pushed against the cool metal door, rolling my eyes when it remained firmly wedged shut. Typical of Donnie to keep the door locked even when he was in there.

I reached up and banged sharply on the door, waiting patiently for Donnie to let me in, my fingers tapping a random pattern against the door jam. Finally the door opened and Donnie stuck his head out looking surprised when he saw it was me. I suppose he had been expecting Mikey.

"Afternoon training already?" he asked in surprised, twisting his head round to look back into his lab "Kind of early isn't it?" he questioned "I thought it normally started at 2? Its only 1.30"

"It's not time for training yet" I replied taking my hand off the door jam "May I?" I indicated the door with my hand meeting his suddenly suspicious eyes calmly before he sighed and stepped back allowing me to enter the room.

"Don't touch anything and I mean anything" he warned me and i nodded. I was well used to Donnie's threat about his lab. He never allowed me or Mikey in here unless he had absolutely no choice. Raph was different though, Raph didn't have the ability to destroy an object just from the slightest touch or look. I suppose it was no surprise that Donnie locked his lab up when I thought about how much of his work that me and Mikey had destroyed between the pair of us without even meaning to.

"Is there something wrong Leo?" he asked me as he made his way back to the large, overcrowded desk situated in the middle of the room, clearly planning on resuming the work he had been in the middle of when I interrupted him. "Only you normally don't come and visit me in the afternoon" I began speaking quickly, trying to capture his attention before he got sucked back into whatever experiment he was working on.

"Raph and Mikey haven't come back yet" I said watching him closely. I saw the exact moment my words penetrated his thought process and watched as his hands stilled mid word on the piece of paper he was writing on. He looked up at me, a frown on his face, worry in his eyes as they focused on me.

"What?" he said, I stood straighter and crossed my arms across my chest as I repeated my sentence.

"Raph and Mikey haven't returned yet from getting the pizza for lunch." Donnie slowly straightened, resting his hands on the table.

"How long have they been gone?" he asked, I shrugged my shoulders and glanced up at the large clock mounted on Donnie's wall.

"An hour and a half give or take" I said "They left about twelve". There was a moment's silence between us.

"They have been out that long before Leo" Donnie pointed out "You know what the pair of them are like once they get together. They lose track of the time, Mikey has probably come up with some mad idea and has convinced Raph to go along with it. He'd have made it interesting enough that Raph won't want to say no to it. That's the way it always works between them"

"Not during the day Donnie and not when lunch is involved. Even Raph and Mikey know that we don't play games and stay out when it's light outside. Not when the chances of being spotted would be so high" Donnie sighed and rubbed the back of his neck looking at me with a narrowed, watchful look as though he was trying to peer directly into my brain to see my thoughts.

"What exactly are you worried about? He asked me. I hesitated for a moment before glancing away from him.

"I think something has happened to them. I don't know what is making me feel that way but something is. I mean come on, one of them at least normally texts us if they are going to be late but I haven't heard anything from either of them. Have you?" I asked, holding onto the slim hope that they had texted Donnie instead of me.

"I'm not sure, let me check" Donnie commented, he lent down and began to rummage through his desk, picking up random sheets of paper which were covered in equations and messy handwriting in his attempt to locate his phone.

"Do you want me to ring it?" I asked him impatiently, resisting the temptation to push the entire lot on the floor.

"There's no point" Donnie commented. "I keep my phone on silent when it's in the lab, I find it distracting if I don't" I bit back a sharp comment and waited. "Here it is" he said in triumph as he pulled the phone out from beneath a text book and flipped it open. He glanced at it before he pressed a button and read, a frown coming to his face.

"I've a text from Raph" he commented "asking me whether I had made my mind up about what I wanted to eat and that if I didn't text back they were going to make sure my pizza had every ingredient I despised on it. He sent it an hour and fifteen minutes ago though."

The slight feeling of worry in my stomach increased until it was churning.

"Then they should be back by now" I said, my hand clenching into a fist "Something has happened to them both" Donnie nodded his head slowly.

"It appears that way" he said reaching and snagging his bag, putting it across his shoulder before he grabbed his Bo. "Where should we start looking" I bit my lip and opened my mouth to speak when I heard one word which chilled my bones and robbed me of my ability to speak.

"HELP."

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**Author Note – **_Yay chapter Two is done and dusted. I hope to have chapter three written and up within the next two weeks though I'm not going to promise anything just in case. I've an idea what I want to do which often helps._

_Anyway I hope you enjoyed it enough to review. No flames though please. Thanks for reading._


	3. Air

Memories

By

Hannio

Chapter Three

Air

**Disclaimers - **_None of the characters mentioned in the below work of fiction belong to me in any shape or form. I'm merely using them for my own entertainment purposes._

**Author Note – **_Yay Chapter three is done and this time its in Mikey's point of view! Hope you enjoy_

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This was all my fault, the same way most thing were my fault. Well mine or Raph's. I just can't help it, its like there's all these ideas zooming around my head and even though I know the ideas are stupid and they'll just result in me getting in trouble with Master Splinter, or a lecture from Leo, the cold shoulder treatment from Donnie or a beating from Raph I still have to do it because it's fun. I like to laugh and the ideas in my head. Well they make me laugh and the results make me laugh as well.

At least normally they do but this result, with my leg smashed up and Raph all loopy in the head, seriously not that great a result. I could kick myself if the action wouldn't unbalance me causing me to fall to the floor in a heap.

If only I had ignored the idea in my head and had obeyed Leo for once. I mean he was pretty clear with his instructions. Go to the Pizzeria at the corner of bleaker. Be in disguise. Grab the four large pizzas without drawing attention to the fact we were large mutant turtles and get home safe. We didn't even get to the pizzeria, though we did remember to wear the human clothes we wore when we were attempting to blend in.

We had nearly gotten there and then one of those zipping ideas suddenly jumped up, latched on to my imagination and that was that. It should have been harder to convince Raph then it had been but I had picked the timing well. He was angry but he wasn't angry at me for once. He was actually quite jokey and mellow towards me which made a nice change and which the back of my head appreciated. No it was toward Leo that Raph's never ending supply of PMT rage was focused on.

It made me laugh the number of times I had to endure a lecture from Leonardo on not provoking Raph into a temper when I knew what a short fuse he possessed and yet Leo did it on a daily basis and god only knew why he did. Raph actually tended to obey the rules. If you told him to stay somewhere then he would grumble and rage against it but he tended to do it. Of course there were times he went off the rails and slipped out of the lair with Casey to bust some heads in but the majority of times he actually did what he was told.

So Leo must have just been suicidal when he pushed and prodded Raph until he exploded and then he had the nerve to look surprised as if Raph was blowing his top for nothing. A part of me found it amusing because it was pretty amusing to watch but the other half pitied Raph; he really couldn't do much right when it came to Leo.

Not that he would remember that now. He was so stubborn, even after I convinced him to spy on the Purple Dragon lackies we saw loitering outside the Pizzeria, even after I had convinced him that it would be fun to attack them he still stuck around with no memory focused on getting me home. I didn't know whether to hug him or hit him but one thing I did know was that this was without a doubt my fault entirely.

"Mikey what's happened? " Donatello demanded, coming to a skid by me, his eyes taking in my leg as his hands gently touched it to see how badly it was broken. I hissed at the slight touch, holding onto consciousness by the skin of my teeth. If Raphael could have a severe concussion and god knew what other injuries and still get us home to a place he didn't remember in one piece then I could certainly keep awake to explain things.

"My fault" I said my eyes on Leo as I saw him open his mouth, his eyes on Raph "As in completely my fault dude. I started the fight and Raph jumped in after me trying to get me out and now… now he can't remember anything" Donnie froze and looked at me, a look coming into his eyes which made me squirm. I had seen that look before; it was the look that meant I had messed up big style once again and that he was pissed at me.

His arm tightened on my arm as he spoke.

"Raph has a head injury?" he said, I nodded my head slowly, watching as Donnie abandoned me to head towards Raph who shot me a confused look "Wait Donnie" I snapped "He doesn't know who you are" I saw the moment Donnie flinched and hated myself for it even as I addressed Raph. "Raph this is our older brother Donnie. He's really good at medical stuff"

"Like a Doctor?" Raph said hesitantly, his gaze fixed on me. He was leaning against the wall, looking close to collapse but he had a wary look about him, like an animal which was being slowly cornered and didn't know whether submitting or fighting was the best option available. I began forcing myself to my feet when Donnie spoke.

"Don't move Mike" he commanded and I willingly dropped back on the sofa that Raph had put me on before I had called out for help. He turned back to Raph and spoke, his voice quiet but firm. The kind of voice you heard and immediately listened to and trusted. I watched Raph's eyes move from mine to look warily at Donnie, who took a slow step forward his hands held up in front of him. "I'm your brother Raph, my name is Donatello but you tend to call me Donnie or Don or Brainiac depending on your mood" he said, he remained quiet for a moment but when Raph didn't speak he continued.

"I'd like to look at your head if you let me?" he asked. Raph shook his head, his eyes narrowing slightly as he spoke.

"Look at Mikey first" he demanded angrily as he jabbed his finger at me.

"Ok" Donnie said, his voice still soothing, he indicated me with his hand as well "If I look at Mikey first and tend to him will you let me tend to you afterwards?" Raphael frowned clearly running the offer through his head; his eyes flickered to me before he nodded.

"Mikey first" he stated again, watching as Donnie turned and walked over to me. I spoke to Raph in an attempt to keep my mind off my own pain both physically from my injuries and emotionally from seeing Raph in this state.

"Raph that's our eldest brother Leo" I said indicating Leo with my hand, wincing as Leo turned to look at me with a look that promised retribution. I was definitely not going to get out of this situation unscathed.

"Leo and Donnie" Raph said with a slight nod of his head, his eyes flickering between both of them as though he was trying to scan their faces into his memories. He probably was.

"Is he going to be ok?" I asked Donnie quietly, my eyes fixed on Raph, Donnie shrugged.

"I won't know until I examine him" Donnie said "I'll need the facts from you as well about what happened and then you'll have to explain yourself to Leo" I winced this time from the thought of what Leo was going to say to me. Not that I could blame him though after all if it wasn't for me then none of this would ever have happened in the first place.

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**Author Note – **_Yay another chapter is done and dusted! I hope you enjoy it, the next chapter will be up in about 2 weeks. Please review but don't flame! Thanks for reading _


	4. Water

Memories

By

Hannio

Chapter Four 

Water

**Disclaimer – **_None of the characters mentioned in the below piece of fiction belong to me in any shape or form. I am merely using them._

**Author Note – **_Here's chapter four!_

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A head injury.

Out of everything that could have happened to Raph why did it have to be a head injury, a bad one if the glazed look in his eyes was anything to go by. He looked as though he could barely stand, leaning heavily against the wall behind him. His eyes fixed on Leo, watching his every mood as though he expected him to attack him. What Raph could have done if Leo had decided that was beyond me but luckily it was a situation we wouldn't have to contemplate.

I understood Leo; he wasn't standing that close to attack Raph, he was standing that close to Raph to be able to catch him when he collapsed because he soon would slide into unconsciousness. Only his sheer stubborn nature was keeping him on his feet and even that couldn't last forever, the fact he had lasted this long was a complete miracle, how he had gotten both him self and Mikey home was beyond me, if I wasn't so worried about his injuries then I would be impressed.

The loss of his memory was worrying me greatly. It wasn't even short term it seemed to be everything, the fact he couldn't even recognise us, his own brothers made me feel sick. I swallowed hard as my heart gave a painful tug in my chest. God I hoped that passed swiftly.

If it passed at all.

I blocked the thought off quickly unable to face that possibility and instead focused on Mikey. The sooner I dealt with him the quicker I could turn my attention to Raph. Head injury or not he was clearly still as stubborn as ever.

I should feel sorry for Mikey really, the break in his leg was a nasty one. He would recover but it would take time and it would take patience. Time was easy; we had plenty of it but patience? That was a word that one wouldn't exactly put in the same sentence as Mikey. He simply didn't possess any.

I wanted to question him, to find out exactly what had possessed him to do this. How many of his ideas had to go wrong for it to finally penetrate his head that any idea that he thought of normally ended up badly for one of us. He would always be sorry and mope around the lair for a few days until he had been forgiven but once he had obtained that he would be back to his usual self, causing trouble and mayhem.

Still it wasn't my place to question him or shake him or punch him, no matter how much I wanted to do all three things at this moment in time. It was my job simply to treat him, watch him and then give the okay to Leo to question him.

I wouldn't want to swap with Mikey for all the tea in china.

I was surprised at how quiet Mikey was, normally he would be chattering away, describing in detail how he got his injury, making us laugh often against our will and yet he was completely silent, his gaze focused on Raph, watching him carefully. He barely reacted when I touched his leg other then to flinch occasionally, not one girly scream passed his lips.

I glanced back at Raph from the corner of my eye but he was still conscious, still in the same position, eyes still focused on Leo. I doubted he knew anyone else was even in the same room.

"How is he?" I blinked in surprise, glancing round as I realised Raph had spoken, his question clearly directed to me though he didn't look over at me at all.

"Well it's a nasty break but he's going to be okay" I replied, watching as Raph sagged back, his legs giving out as he slid down the wall. I watched Leo spring forward, hands reaching out when he stopped himself. Instead he knelt down in front of Raph, his hands palms out in front of him in a classic peaceful gesture.

Raph continued to watch him warily though there was no anger in his expression. My hands stilled on Mikey's leg as I watched the scene ready to leap in if the need arose.

"Raph" Leo said, his voice surprisingly soothing "Donnie is taking care of Mikey like you asked. Would you allow me to look at your head wound? Its still bleeding and I'd like to stem the flow of it if you'd allow me to" I forced my hands to continue the process of splinting Mikey's leg aware of Raph's eye turning to us. He wasn't looking at me though; he was looking at Mikey, a questioning look on his face.

"You can trust him dude" Mikey said, breaking his silence, his voice slightly breathless no doubt from the pain he was enduring. I was going to have to get him some pain killers for that. The only problem was that they would knock him out and clearly Raph felt that he needed Mikey there. "Leo always looks out for us" Mikey continued giving Raph a reassuring smile.

Raph's eyes narrowed for a moment, searching Mikey's face before he looked back at Leo and nodded once, his body relaxing as Leo scooted next to him. I glanced at them to see Leo speaking to Raph but his voice was too low for me to hear his words.

I focused my attention on Mikey.

"Are you in a great deal of pain?" I questioned using the voice my brothers had dubbed my Doctor Don voice.

"A bit" Mikey replied, his face pale and sweaty He swallowed deeply as I finished the splint.

"You have a choice" I commented still speaking in the same calm voice. "I can give you some pain killers which will numb the pain, however they will put you to sleep or-"

"No" he replied instantly cutting me off before I could continue "I'm not taking anything that will put me to sleep, not unless you give the same thing to Raph" I raised an eye ridge at his tone.

"Raph has a severe concussion" I answered, my voice harsher then I wanted it to be "I have to keep him awake for at least twenty four hours, him going to sleep would be the worst thing he could do right about now"

"In that case I'll be awake for twenty four hours then" Mikey replied, his own eyes narrowing into a glare as they met mine "This is my fault and I'm gonna deal with it. If it means I need to stay awake for twenty four hours in pain then big deal I'll do it. Raph would do the same for me"

I watched him for a moment feeling surprisingly proud of him before I nodded.

"Good" I remarked "I was hoping you'd say that, I can give you some pain killers that aren't as strong but they will take the edge off the pain and make it more bearable to deal with, I'm putting Raph into the lab so I can keep an eye on him-"

"Then put me in there as well" he remarked bluntly "I'm not gonna let him deal with this alone"

"Fine" I remarked before I patted his shoulder "You've really done it this time Mikey" I remarked quietly watching as he nodded

"I know"

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**Author Note – **_Yay chapter four is done and dusted! I hope you like it! Please review but no flames, I'll try and update as soon as I can._


	5. Confusion is an understatement

Memories

By

Hannio

Chapter Five

Confusion is an understatement

Disclaimer – _None of the characters mentioned in the story below belong to me in any fashion, I am merely using the characters for my own entertainment purposes._

Author Note – _Here's the next chapter, sorry for the delay in it coming, it simply couldn't be helped. I am off this week from work though so I'm hoping to find some time to write some more. Anyway please enjoy!_

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I blinked against the sudden light shining in my eyes, squinting as I glared at the torch that was providing the source of my discomfort. Did the stupid thing have to be so bright? My head gave a sharp throb which made my stomach churn as I lent my head back against the cool stone wall behind me. I didn't exactly need my memory to know I was in bad shape. The expression on Leo's face was more then enough to tell me.

He looked worried sick which was never a good sign. If he was allowing his worry to show then I must have looked a state.

"I'm sorry" he suddenly said attracting my attention from my scattered thoughts to him. What had he to be sorry for? It wasn't as though he was the one who had handed me my ass several times in a row or the guy who had broken Mike's leg. Some of my confusion must have been on my face because he answered my unasked question. "I can tell from your face that the light is bothering you and I'm sorry, it's just that Donnie wants me to check how your pupils are reacting to light" he gave a helpless shrug.

My eyes flickered away from him instead focusing on Donnie, narrowing slightly as I saw him silently plastering Mike's leg. At least he had kept his word and focused on him first. I could tell he wasn't happy about it, I don't know how I could but he was definitely pissed. He wanted to be with me, testing me and making sure I was ok.

I'm no expert but I would say I was far from ok, at least I assumed I was no expert.

I glanced back at Leo, realising that he was expecting an answer from me, perhaps not expecting but certainly hoping for one, he was looking for a sign that some vague memory of him was still swirling around my head, that his brother hadn't actually forgotten his existence. I swallowed, my mouth surprisingly dry, as I forced the words through my parched throat.

"No sweat, you gotta do, what you gotta do right?" I rasped at him, my efforts rewarding me with a batch of coughing which turned his pleased smile into a look of concern.

Jesus coughing made my head hurt, in fact even breathing was making my head hurt.

"Do you want some water Raph?" he demanded, slipping his arm around me and supporting me until the coughing fit ebbed. It must have been all the smoke from the place. It probably got into mine and Mike's lungs when we were out cold or something.

I went to nod but stopped as my head gave another nasty throb and instead settled on giving him a thumbs up. He nodded his head and gently rested me back against the wall before getting to his feet and hurrying across the floor towards what I assumed was the kitchen area,

"We're finished here Mikey" I glanced round at the voice to see Donnie get to his feet as well "Stay there until it dries and then once it is we'll move you onto a bed or the sofa, you're not going to be able to move much for the next few days, after that you'll become accustomed to the extra weight and should be able to hobble around though the stairs may be beyond you for a while. I'll ask Leo to make you a crutch to help you with the walking and balance combo."

"Ok" I heard Mikey say faintly, his face looking pale under the light. He looked like shit, man I hoped he was ok; it was bound to have been my fault that we were even in the situation in the first place.

I continued to watch the other turtle as Donnie turned away from Mikey and walked towards me, stopping in front of me before lowering himself down so he was resting on his knees.

"Are you happy that Mike is taken care of now?" he asked me, his voice was quiet, the sound almost soothing relaxing me against my will, the sound of it certainly didn't make my head want to explode like Leo's and Mike's voices did. I watched him curiously waiting to see what he would do now; he lowered his eyes from mine for a moment before looking back up, a steely determined look in them which had been missing before. It was a look which made it clear that he wasn't going to wait for a yes from me any longer. "Will you finally allow me to look at you Raphie?" he demanded, an anxious tone to his voice which I could tell he was trying to hide "I really need to check out your head wound to make sure its nothing too serious"

"Mike's ok?" I asked, picking up on the flare of annoyance in his eyes before he nodded.

"Mike is in a lot better shape then you are" he stated bluntly. I was almost amused by the sudden change in tact from him. It would appear that Doctor Donnie was certainly in the house.

"Ok, do what you have to" I replied, waiting for what would happen next. He gave me a sharp look almost to see whether I was joking before he started rapidly asking me questions which made my head spin.

Does light effect you?

Do you feel sick?

Can you move everything?

How far back can you remember?

When you try to remember what happens?

I blinked at him, glancing up as Leo held out a glass of water to me which I took eagerly, taking a sip. Surely nothing had ever tasted as good as that water. They were all watching me which was driving me mad; I couldn't stand being the centre of attention that was Mike's position.

"Perhaps we should take it more slowly Donnie, Raph's been through a lot today" Leo suggested quietly, his eyes flickering between Donnie's intent face and mine. I wondered what he saw in my expression. Was it confusion? Fear? Exhaustion? I could feel exhaustion pulling at every part of my body, including my mind. It was making me feel as though everything was in slow motion. It made it hard to concentrate on anything but the pain.

"All the more reason to try and gather as much information as we can Leo, once I know it all Raph can rest and focus on healing. Master Splinter will be able to help with the memory side of things, we need to focus on what we can deal with, mainly his head injury" Donnie replied back swiftly giving Leo a pointed look.

Was this normal?

The most annoying thing about losing my memory other then the sheer amount of pain it caused my brain was the vague feelings I felt. I could still look at Leo and Donnie and read them like a book. I could see in Donnie's face his need to heal me and I could see from Leo's posture his need to protect me but protect me against what exactly? Myself? Donnie?

It was like everything they did simply brought up more unanswered questions. It was so frustrating. How could I know that what Donnie and Leo were thinking and yet not remember what I did yesterday. Why couldn't I remember everything? It was like there was a black hole in my head and everything was getting sucked in with no way for me to stop it. I didn't want my memories to disappear, I wanted them back.

"I guess so, I mean after all you're the expert in this Donnie." Leo replied after a moment's hesitation. Donatello shot him a swift pleased look before looking back at me.

"You tested his pupils' right?" he asked Leonardo, his gaze focused on my head. I'm assuming I had a nasty cut or something, certainly my face felt sticky as though I had dried blood on my face.

"The light bothered him, I think it made his head worse but his pupils did react to it I assume that's what you wanted me to check right?" Leonardo answered as he hunched down to the side of me, taking the glass from my hand with a warm smile at me that did nothing to hide the concern in his eyes.

"Do you feel sick at all Raph?" Donatello asked me abruptly. He reached up and softly touched my forehead, I hissed, the breath leaving my body as though he had punched me in the stomach at the sheer pain that simple touch caused me. My vision swam for a moment before it cleared allowing me to hold onto consciousness for a bit longer.

"Yes and I feel tired before you ask" I muttered leaning back against the wall; it was too much effort to keep my body upright any longer. All I wanted to do was sleep, I was sure that once I had some sleep my memory would return and everything would be back to normal.

"Don't fall asleep on us Raph" Donatello stated but his voice sounded far away like the time we had gone swimming and my brothers had been talking to each other when I was under water. I felt a bit like that now, Heavy and strangely peaceful. I felt my eyes close and the darkness which had been threatening my vision from the moment I woke up to surround me.

All I needed was rest.

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Author Note – _I hope you enjoyed it. Chapter six will be up soon. Please review but no flames._


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